The Slayers Learn to Drive
by Lady Belegwen Lightningblade
Summary: Back in the days when I wrote this it wasn't cliche. Even now it is at least slightly less unoriginal than it could have been. any other vaulable information is given in the title.


The Slayers Learn to Drive  
  
****************  
  
Lina sat nervously in the driver's seat. "So how many times do I have to do this to get my license?"  
  
The instructor beside her giggled. "That is secret. Now, put your foot on the brake."  
  
"Is that the pedal on the right or the pedal on the left?"  
  
"Guess!"  
  
Lina put her foot hesitantly on the right pedal.  
  
Xellos continued smiling. "Turn on the ignition, and now put the car in drive."  
  
"Is that the 'd'?"  
  
Xellos didn't answer.  
  
Lina sighed and decided to try the d. They moved forward rapidly, Lina's foot being hard on the accelerator. "Ahhhhhhhh!"  
  
"That, Lina Inverse, would be the accelerator, not the brake." Xellos grin grew even more demonic than usual.  
  
Lina was too busy steering around trees to hear him.  
  
In the backseat, Zelgadis set down a handbook on driving. "Brake, Lina!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Other pedal!"  
  
They jerked to a stop.  
  
"That was interesting," Xellos commented.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me it was the other pedal?!?!?" Lina turned and began to strangle Xellos, but in doing so, removed her foot from the brake, and they began to roll slowly forward. She clamped down on it again.   
  
Zelgadis sighed. "This is going to be a long day."  
  
**************  
  
"It isn't just!" Amelia whined. "Lina got to drive for more than an hour! And Mister Zelgadis and Filia got nearly as much, but I only got fifteen minutes!"  
  
"Then you can go first tomorrow!" Xellos answered cheerfully. "Now! Back to the parking lot we go!"  
  
**************  
  
"Highway 384! Are you crazy? I'm driving there!" Amelia panicked.  
  
"Yes, Highway 384! I like to think so! And you did want to drive first today!"  
  
"B-b-but, there's LOTS of cars there and they all go so fast!"  
  
"Precisely."  
  
"But I can barely drive a straight line!"  
  
"That's too bad."  
  
"You're mean!"  
  
"Thank you."  
  
*************  
  
"You're driving too fast, Zelgadis."  
  
Zelgadis slowed to a crawl.  
  
"I said you're driving too fast."  
  
Zelgadis gritted his teeth, and came to a complete stop.  
  
Xellos yawned from under the magazine that covered his face. "You're still going to fast."  
  
"We're stopped."  
  
Xellos looked out. "Why so we are! You can start the car again, Zelgadis." He once again covered his face with the magazine.  
  
Zelgadis returned to driving.  
  
"You're going too fast again."  
  
Zelgadis pushed down harder on the accelerator.  
  
"That's better."  
  
*************  
  
Filia swerved, avoiding the cute kitten sitting in the middle of the road.  
  
Xellos marked his grade sheet. "Minus five points for swerving."  
  
"Shut up and let me drive, raw garbage!"  
  
"Minus ten points for insulting the teacher."   
  
"Urgh."   
  
"Minus three points for growling."  
  
Filia wasn't paying attention anymore, she was glaring at the back of the car in front of her. At the next light, she put on the emergency brake and got out of the car.  
  
"What's she doing?" Amelia asked, craning to see over Xellos' seat.  
  
"Put your seatbelt back on, Amelia." Xellos laughed. "Oh, my! She is mad!"  
  
Filia had taken out her mace and was beating the car in front of them.  
  
"Why's she doing that?" Lina asked.  
  
"Oh, I think it must have been the bumpersticker," Xellos said calmly.  
  
Zelgadis looked a the car in front of them. "That car doesn't have a bumpersticker."  
  
Xellos smirked. "Well, she thinks it does."  
  
"That wouldn't have anything to do with you would it?" Lina asked.  
  
"Would I do that?"  
  
"What does it say?"  
  
"Oh, I forget, 'dragons suck' or 'mazoku power', something like that."  
  
*************  
  
Xellos sat on top of the car, typical grin on his face. "Well, I'm pleased to annouce you all passed your driver's exam and have earned your driver's licenses. And, Filia, you'll be pleased to know that Mr. Descartes isn't going to sue."  
  
Filia hit him on the head with her mace. "Raw garbage! It was your fault!"  
  
Xellos laughed. "That tickles! Do it again!"  
  
Zelgadis looked at Filia. "Allow me." He jabbed his fingers into the mazoku's ribecage, tickling him.  
  
"Stop! Stop!"  
  
Lina slid into the driver's seat, planning to go pick up Gourry. She was hungry.  
  
*************  
  
This is one of several fanfics of mine, ones I wrote a long time ago, but never posted to fanfiction.net. This *may* be my first Slayers fanfic . . . It might also be Gift of Love, both were written a LONG time ago, in 2000, when I had first gotten into anime. This was written while I was actually taking driver's ed, and it gave me something to take my mind off of tests and such. The odd thing about this fanfic is that I wrote it before I had seen any of the episodes with Filia in them. Regardless of this fact, I think I did a pretty good job with her, though it's hard to screw up on a story that is purely humor.--Lady Belegwen Lightningblade


End file.
